Damn it! There goes the pancreas.

 I created this blog because 10 years ago after being diagnosed with a tumor on my pancreas I went to the internet in search of information on life after pancreatic cancer before my whipple and all I found was bleak. 

Here I am 10 years later and i'm now researching how to live without a pancreas and not much has changed. It's all bleak and I can't handle it... This is some pretty heavy stuff that I've been dealing with for far too long now.


In 2010  I embarked on this journey to save my pancreas. I headed to Paris for a second opinion. I had surgery, it was successful and I got relief from the pain that brought me there in the first place.

Now here we are in 2015 I am in the doctors office I'm in pain I have been for the last six months at least and I am fully expecting that he would suggest the same surgery he has done twice now. I have my questions, I have my objections and suggestions written down so i dont forget anything. 

Then the other shoe drops he has to remove the pancreas. Now one of the drawbacks of being an optimist is that I never saw that coming at all. I was blindsided. I expected him to say we would try that other surgery the one and he did twice already to open of the canal but never and I mean never expected him to say my pancreas needs to be removed. Now here we are again back at square one and I'm faced with the harsh reality and once the pancreas is removed  I will be a diabetic- a full blown- nothing you can do about it- insulin dependant- diabetic.

Though diabetes and insulin injections come with their own side effects: I don't want to be on dialisis! I don't want to loose a leg or my eyesight or die! it doesn't help that a manmy age in my community just passed from complications from Diabetes.

Does this mean I can never have fruits in peace again? Oh and who's injecting said insulin? Surely you don't mean me? Can a girl get one of those automatic insulin pumps? I mean come on! I love A good gadget...

I do however have a six month reprieve. And in true to my optimistic self I will enjoy these last few months with my pancreas doing the things that I've put off for the last couple of years trying to preserve it and just go out there! I'm gonna jump out of a plane dammit!

So this marks the start of my pancreas farewell tour 2016, #PFT16 if you will. 

I was never in the scouts but I love to be prepared so somewhere in this in the next six months I am going to prepare myself for what is the come. And consult with the necessary the medical professionals that i guess I'll be dealing with from here on in.